My day out pretending to be Jeremy Vine

The pedestrian version, that is

It’s not easy shouting at random strangers

Recently I was out and about in London when a teenage boy on a bicycle almost crashed into me - and several others.

He was on the pavement, weaving in and out of us at a fast pace. He had no care for our safety and I couldn’t help thinking that he enjoyed terrorising people with his speed. It got me thinking about how much of the time I spend trying to dodge aggressive cyclists.

This especially annoyed me because cyclists can be some of the most moralistic and officious people. Take Jeremy Vine, the lycra-loving TV presenter, who regularly posts videos of himself travelling on his bike. Using a body cam, he uploads footage of drivers who, in his opinion, have behaved terribly, onto the internet - sometimes putting the film into slow motion and adding anguished commentary. “Drivers are the enemy!” is the message (whereas Jeremy is doing God’s work on his two wheels).

After my close-shave experience involving the teenage boy on his bicycle, I had an idea. I would become Jeremy Vine - the pedestrian version - and play cyclists at their own game, filming their transgressions on my Chaz Cam (my self-titled, pedestrian version of body cam; technically the lens of my iPhone 11).

It goes without saying that cyclists aren’t as dangerous as cars on average, and of course, not everyone cycles badly. But too often you hear “it’s only a few bad eggs giving others a bad name” to minimise the number of naughty cyclists - when the issue is actually quite pronounced, as I have found. I would guess it’s more like half of cyclists behaving badly on the road, not a minority.

Without further ado, here are some of the main findings of my day out.

Cyclists often go through red lights

My first discovery was the number of cyclists who go through red lights, in contravention of the Highway Code, which says they “must obey all traffic signs and traffic light signals” and must not cross the stop line when the traffic lights are red”. I lost count of the number of cyclists doing this on my day out with the Chaz Cam.

Although you might say I was being pedantic (well, I was pretending to be the pedestrian version of Jeremy Vine) and that cyclists may as well go through the light if no pedestrians are waiting, I found they do even when a pedestrian is there. One female cyclist dashed out at me as soon as the pedestrian light went green (see below):

Another time, I spotted a male Deliveroo rider almost run into a mother and her child when it was their right of way.

Some cyclists also unnerve drivers when they go through red lights, as their movements are so unpredictable.

Cyclists on their phones

The next thing I found was that cyclists using their phones while travelling, especially when completing a job. While this isn’t illegal, per se, the Highway Code advises them “You must not ride in a dangerous, careless or inconsiderate manner” - with the maximum fine for mobile use being £1,000; something that doesn’t seem to be enforced very well. It wasn’t unusual to see cyclists riding with one hand or none on their handlebars, as if thinking they looked extremely cool while doing so.

One cyclist, who a van white beeped at, due to his being dangerously close in front, sped away, only to look at something other than the road (my guess being his phone).

Lighting issues

Something I never knew, until I began monitoring cyclists, is that it’s illegal for them to cycle on a public road after dark without lights and reflectors. I found this by far one of the biggest cycling transgressions; tens of cyclists don’t do this and/ or wear dark clothing, making it hard for drivers and pedestrians to spot them.

Pavement patrol

Cyclists are also overly relaxed about going on pavements, despite Section 72 of the Highway Act 1985 saying they must not “wilfully rid[e]” on footpaths. Some cyclists move through pedestrians at an alarming rate, with little to no care whether they are elderly or otherwise vulnerable. This is certainly what I found that day with the teenage boy; it seems to me a few of them even like the terror they inflict by speeding through crowds.

Delivery companies have some of the worst cyclists

One thing that became particularly obvious to me was the number working for delivery companies who did not adhere to the Highway Code (going through traffic lights, for instance). It may be the case that these cyclists would have always been bad cyclists, no matter which company they worked for. But I can’t help but wonder if having to rush people’s food around for tiny sums of money is making people cycle dangerously. Although many politicians act as if cycling will lead us to a perfect green utopia, the reality is huge numbers of low-paid workers (mainly men, in my experience) dashing around too quickly.

Conclusions

Overall, Chaz Cam investigations have hardly convinced me that the UK is ready for a cycling revolution.

It’s worth emphasising that some councils around the UK are hell-bent on this idea. It’s not uncommon to see leaflets and posters about “Liveable Neighbourhoods”, featuring cartoons of people in wheelchairs whizzing down their street, as cyclists gently go past - designed to sell the idea of diverse cycling utopia to voters.

The reality, in my opinion, is that half of cyclists behave well, and half of cyclists don’t. It’s definitely not the case that “most cyclists follow the rules”. They don’t - because they perceive themselves as “the green and the good” of British society. It’s also generally my experience that most cyclists are male (and young), and the most aggressive ones almost always so, countering councils’ propaganda of inclusive transport.

Although I joke about my “Chaz Cam” and Jeremy Vine, there is a serious point to this piece. When cyclists disobey the rules, there can be terrible consequences.

In 2016, Kim Briggs, 44, a mother of two, was killed after a (then) 18-year-old man, riding an illegal “fixie” bike with no front brakes, ran into her. Kim, a mother of two, suffered “catastrophic” head injuries and died in hospital a week after she was hit. Her widower Matthew has since campaigned for a new Death by Dangerous Cycling law (his campaign account here).

And this July, a male cyclist in Oxford was charged for killing an 81-year-old by careless cycling and bodily harm by wanton/ furious driving. She suffered serious injuries and died in hospital.

Ultimately, there’s a reason that the Highway Code has tough rules for cyclists. They can cause a huge amount of damage if they do not conduct themselves sensibly, as I suspect the teenage boy I saw that day would have done, were he to have hit a pedestrian.

Another concern I have is that UK cycling obsession increases social exclusion. With vehicles being pushed off the roads, even in spite of Rishi Sunak’s best efforts to halt the War on Cars, it’ll be the elderly, disabled and/ or vulnerable who suffer the consequences.

After all, are they going to be the ones going through lights, and riding through the pavements, or the ones bashed about by the young men who do?

Anyone reading this article may think I have a problem with cyclists; the irony being that I actually enjoy it myself, once taking children on long-distance cycling trips in Vermont, in the United States, when I worked at a summer camp.

I walk, take public transport and I don’t own a car. Several years ago I reversed into a dumpster and decided the world didn’t need any more of my driving.

But it’s the hypocrisy that gets me, along with the fact that some of their behaviour could seriously hurt people.

With my Chaz Cam, there’ll be no cyclists getting off the hook.